My First Time

We all have a story, and whether or not we will admit it, we remember.  Our first time.  I'm not talking about sex, that's for someone else to write about.  I am talking about the first time that someone made you feel fat.  (Sorry for using the 'f' word)  Today at work I shared my first time story...

...I remember so vividly the first time it happened.  I was new to Ely.  My family had moved a couple months into the school year, which seemed to make life a little harder.  It was my first day and it was lunch time.  I was sitting with a few kids I had just met when this boy (who is still very much a boy today-loser...) came up to me.  He asked if I knew what he was holding in his hand.  It was yogurt.  He decided to go through and tell me about the calories and nutritional values.  He asked, with the cockiest of cocky grins, "Do you know what those are?"  He continued, "If you don't, just look at my body.  That's everything you need to know."  My mind was racing.  Never before had this happened to me.  I thought I was fine.  I thought that I looked fine and that I was beautiful and smart.  I responded with the first thing that came to my mind, "Do you know what this is?  (Held up my middle finger.)  If you don't, just look at your face.  That's all you need to know."  With a red face he walked away and took the yogurt with him.  

I don't know what made me feel worse: being made fun of because of my weight or giving him the bird.  (Although I did get some satisfaction out of it.)  I went home and cried.  And cried a little more.  When I was through with what I felt was my mid-life crisis, I made a decision- I was never ever going to allow someone to make me feel like that again.  And they haven't.   

No one enjoys their first time, but they always remember it.  We remember the hurt, the aching, and how it made us feel about ourselves.  I say give those feelings the bird!  Instead say out loud, 

"I AM BEAUTIFUL!  I AM SMART!  I AM STRONG!"   

And don't let anyone, including yourself, make you feel otherwise!  

I love myself now.  Because I do, I will love myself even more in the future.  

-Tiffany

P.S.  I would enjoy hearing about your first time.  Email, comment, or message me through Facebook.  

The Plan

Today I started the hardest part of The Tiffany Project- my body.

Everyone at work has been eating healthier, working out, or creating their personal fitness plan.  That got me thinking, what about me?  I have always been very confident in myself.  I have a good self-esteem.  I don't care what others say about how I look and I don't let my weight limit me when it comes to activities.  When I look in the mirror I see a small girl, when in reality I am a big girl.

At work, I have been talking about how I want to be healthier and how it's time for me to be serious about my weight and how I eat.  My boss, Lori, went to school for nutrition.  She quickly got excited and asked to get on board with me!  She has designed a plan for her and I to follow for the next 12 weeks.  We aren't just dieting, we are eating healthy foods and in the proper portion.

Here is The Plan for our 12 weeks:

-We will focus on reducing fat and overall caloric intakes, while incorporating more whole grains, fruits and vegetables into our diets.

-We will try to maintain daily caloric intakes at around 1800 calories, fat at about 60 grams per day; through 3 meals a day with 4 snacks a day.

-We will measure our weight once a week on the same day of the week.

-We will set a goal to lose 2-3#/week, establishing rewards to give ourselves for achieving each 5# increment of weight loss.

-We will be taking progress photos every 4 weeks.

-We will be increasing our activity levels, some exercise and some fun stuff, which Sydnee (our co-worker) will help us with.

-We are going to be patient and forgiving with ourselves, while holding ourselves accountable for the changes we need to complete.

-We are going to have FUN!


Lori prepares my meals and snacks for me every day!  She caters the meal plan to my likes and what I need nutritionally.  Today was the first day, and I absolutely loved it!  All of the food was delicious, I didn't even have enough room to eat it all!  I already feel my body thanking me for eating better!  This morning I did some crunches and a lot of stretching.  Boy do I feel those crunches...  I will end the night with some more exercises in preparation for a jog tomorrow.  (Wish me luck!)

I know that I can better who I am.  I am going to trim down my body to make room for the real me- someone that I might have been hiding and never knew it.  I need and want to be healthy.  I want to be healthy now so that my future family will be also.  I want to change how I eat, what I eat, and what I do.  I started today.

-Tiffany


P.S. Here are some photos of me beginning the project.  Judge away!

The Beginning of What Was Already Begun

Webster's Dictionary defines the word 'project' as, "a specific plan or design."

I look at my life and it fits the very definition.  My life is a specific plan and design. Therefore, according to Webster, my life is a project. 

When I start a new project I design the plan of how to complete the project in the most efficient and effectuate way.  This time the project I am taking on is a project that was already begun.

My life hasn't always been lived in the most efficient and effectuate way.  I have had highs and lows.  I have had to reconstruct parts of me that needed the work, wasting precious and valuable time.  I have also had experiences that have given me a firm foundation on which I can build.  

That is where I must start on this project.  If I want to do this right I have to start from where I am the strongest.  I will uproot the weeds and plant the seeds.

Come with me as I begin the project that was already begun.     

-Tiffany